The Addams Family is famous for being creepy and kooky ( I bet the rest of the song is playing in your head now, right?), but they’re also great role models for building self-confidence. Look to Gomez, Morticia, Wednesday, Pugsley, and the rest of the clan for inspiration to believe in and celebrate yourself.
Confidence Lessons from Gomez and Morticia
Confidence Lessons from the Other Characters
Confidence Lessons from the Whole Family
Take Addams Family values to heart. Have the confidence to be true to yourself even if you have the only house on the block with a bed of nails and a two-headed sea turtle. You’ll get more out of life and your increased confidence will lead the way to success.
]]>This is the basis of unconscious bias.
]]>Understandable. I’m pretty sure we’ve all done it at some point in our adult lives.
But why?
Have you ever stopped to consider that question?
Almost everything we do is a habit, which means that in most cases you have been doing it so long that it is now an unconscious thought or action. As soon as you see someone, you make a judgment and categorize them. We can’t help it. Our brains are always trying to keep us safe, based on our unconscious definition of safety. It has to quickly categorize the people and situations you encounter so that it knows how you should respond.
This is the basis of unconscious bias.
According to Vanderbilt University,
“Unconscious bias (or implicit bias) is often defined as prejudice or unsupported judgments in favor of or against one thing, person, or group as compared to another, in a way that is usually considered unfair. Many researchers suggest that unconscious bias occurs automatically as the brain makes quick judgments based on past experiences and background. As a result of unconscious biases, certain people benefit and other people are penalized. In contrast, deliberate prejudices are defined as conscious bias (or explicit bias). Although we all have biases, many unconscious biases tend to be exhibited toward minority groups based on factors such as class, gender, sexual orientation, race, ethnicity, nationality, religious beliefs, age, disability and more.”
(https://www.vanderbilt.edu/diversity/unconscious-bias/)
I think that sums it up nicely.
There are several different types of unconscious bias that we should be aware of. I have included them below, as explained by People Goal, https://www.peoplegoal.com/blog/10-examples-of-unconscious-bias
I know. That was a lot, right? But I do believe it was necessary.
So now that you know what it is, how do you stop yourself from doing it?
Well, it’s unconscious so you can’t stop it automatically or permanently. But you can focus on recognizing your biases and trying to consciously work through them. It will take work, but it is doable.
I truly believe that empathy is one of the best ways to combat unconscious bias.
Everyone that hasn’t suffered a brain injury or mental illness is capable of empathy. Some of us are in touch with this ability, while others could use a little practice.
What is empathy?
Empathy is the concern for the welfare of others. It’s the ability to detect or predict the emotions and thoughts of others.
It’s easy to see why this would be a handy skill to master. Empathy has an impact on your relationships. This is true for both your personal and professional relationships. Empathy can make your life easier and more fulfilling at home and at work!
Empathy is an important skill. It can be very difficult. Especially if you're like me and your mind is always trying to think ahead and plan the next 10 things on your to-do list. But it can greatly increase your ability to communicate and connect with others. Being able to understand their feelings and thoughts will boost your rapport with them. Enhance your personal and work relationships with empathy and you’ll benefit in many ways.
]]>This year has been interesting from the very beginning.
There are very few things that I think we can all agree would help make us better people and make life better for everyone else.
Two of those things are compassion and empathy. Today we will focus on compassion.
According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, Compassion is “sympathetic consciousness of others' distress together with a desire to alleviate it”
Being compassionate helps you see yourself and others as human beings who all have needs, wants, and problems that they are trying to solve.
Compassion brings both short and long-term happiness. Showing compassion not only allows you to feel better, but it helps those around you to feel better, too. Since we all want to be happy, showing compassion can be a common goal for everyone.
Cultivating compassion is a worthwhile goal. It’s a significant part of being human and can make you more grateful for the many good things you already have in your life.
How can we be more compassionate?
Being compassionate is really a gift you give to yourself. When you’re kinder to others, you learn to be kinder to yourself. You also encourage others to take an interest in your life and to direct compassion back in your direction.
If you’d like to learn more about compassion or just want to be around others who wish to be more compassionate, join me in the Compassion and Action Free Facebook group. We will discuss why compassion is important, ways we can practice compassion, unconscious bias and how it impacts our daily lives, and how mindfulness can improve our ability to be compassionate. Join me now: Compassion and Action
]]>As much as I have tried to work through this in my mind, I just can't.
I am angry.
I am beyond angry.
]]>I'm sure by now you have heard about the protests due to the continued use of excessive force and killing of African-Americans by the police. This is also about the way some members of our society use their privilege to purposely harm those who would dare step out of their place. This is not new but it has been denied for a long time. Thanks to technology and social media, it is now being put in the face of the rest of the country.
I have had to step a little deeper into my thoughts this time. And to be honest, I'm not ok.
As much as I have tried to work through this in my mind, I just can't.
I am angry.
I am beyond angry.
Angry at a world where people feel so entitled that they have no care whatsoever for the life of another human being. There is never a good reason, never a sane moment in hatred.
But this isn't hatred, not all of it. Some of it is and we cannot ignore that fact. But the brunt of my anger is toward the people who know they have the upper hand and use it to purposely hurt someone else. Hurt someone who they believe is inferior to them, hurt someone just because they have a different belief, or look a certain way. Hurt someone because they are in a position of power and their actions will not have consequences.
Our systems of belief need a change. Our way of living needs a change. Our way of being needs a change.
When you cannot see someone, who is different, as another human being, it's time to stop and re-evaluate who you are.
YES, I SAID IT!
And when you can watch so much inequity and injustice, and just be glad that it's not happening to you, it's time to re-evaluate who you are and what you stand for.
Don't get me wrong, each one of us has a right to take the time we need to understand and feel our emotions. That is what I have been doing. Honestly, I'm still trying to figure out how I'm going to contribute to the improvement of the situation and our institutions.
When people in power continuously use that power to hurt certain groups of people, those people will get pissed off. And then to be told that they shouldn't be pissed off, shouldn't be angry, shouldn't use their constitutional right to protest, shouldn't do or say anything against the very people who have hurt them.
Imagine how you would feel.
Really sit back and think about how you would feel.
To know that a group that you belong to has been targetted and you are expected to sit down and shut up every time something happens. It is absolutely fucking infuriating!
But...
But it is also a critical pivot point in our lives. It is right now that we can make the decision to continue to do what we have always done, which is to get mad, make a few social media posts (for those who do), and then move on with our lives.
Or we can honestly ask "How can I change my actions to make this country better?" "What is in my sphere of control?" "What can I do today to get started?"
While I don't know how I can change our systems, or if I can. I know that I can do something.
I do believe in the power of meditation and mindfulness. I do believe that compassion is needed right now. And I believe that we, as a whole, need it for ourselves as well as offering it to others.
It is with this in mind that I have decided to lead a 2 week (14-day) FB pop-up group, Compassion and Action. In this group, we will learn about unconscious bias, how it impacts the way we relate to others, and actions to challenge our biases. Change cannot come without awareness. I will also share a guided meditation to increase compassion.
Just for a moment, imagine the difference it would make if just 10% of the population increased their level of compassion and awareness. Now imagine that each person shared their experience with 2 people, who try it and then share it with 2 more people. The effects of this simple practice could be incredible.
There is no cost for joining Compassion and Action. However, I do ask that you commit to doing the hard work of becoming aware of your biases, work to challenge them, and do the meditation every day for 2 weeks, whether it is with the group or on your own.
If you'd like to join us or would like more information, please click here. You can also email me directly, tameeka@coffeeyogalife.com.
Let go of the anger.
Let go of the anxiety.
Let go of the fear.
Only together can we make the changes that are so desperately needed in our society.
]]>What are you missing out on because you are scared?
Because something feels uncomfortable?
What would it take for you to step out of your comfort zone and do the thing that makes you scared?
]]>Honestly, I signed-up because my friend signed up. I mean I knew that I needed this and really believed it would help me remember why I wanted to start Coffee.Yoga.Life. I also knew that Coffee.Yoga.Life. was how I wanted to share my message and I knew that my message was important to share.
But to be honest, I am a happy introvert who doesn’t like sharing personal information with strangers. I always dread the "Tell us a little bit about you" at every workshop that I've attended.
Knowing it was going to be a Zoom Video Call where we would be paired with strangers and asked to share personal stories made me a bit nervous and if it wasn’t for my friend I probably would have backed out.
But I also made a promise to myself this year that I would do the uncomfortable things. I would do the things that helped me grow as a person and in my business. After all, my word for 2020 is “Intentional Action”. How could I truly claim that I was living up to my word if I backed out of this amazing opportunity to work with Simon Sinek’s team just because it made me feel uncomfortable?
So I made myself look human again and joined the call with video turned on (my first time joining a video with my video turned on since the beginning of Google Hangout). It was a bit nerve-wracking, but I found a beautiful background on Canva and that helped me not feel like I was inviting complete strangers into my home.
I admit, I really wasn’t excited about working with a partner but it turned out AMAZING. My partner was awesome, and we worked through these exercises like they were nothing. The craziest part, to me, is that she got me.
In the short time that we spent together on Zoom, she was able to nail my “Why”. As soon as she read it to me, I felt it deep in my bones that she was right. I added to it a little but she nailed it.
The next day I spoke to my friend, the one was in the workshop with me, and she confirmed it for me. I’ve known her for years, she’s more like a sister than a friend, and she would definitely let me know if I wasn’t being honest with myself.
Here’s my Why, and also the reason I started Coffee.Yoga.Life.
“To celebrate, engage, and inspire people so that they feel appreciated and celebrated for who they are and who they want to be.”
I shared this experience because sometimes we really need to step out of our comfort zones to get the results we are looking for. Stepping out of your comfort zone allows you to grow and see yourself in a different light.
New experiences open you up to meet new people, try new things, and learn a bit more about the world around you. And they open you up for more new experiences.
What are you missing out on because you are scared?
Because something feels uncomfortable?
What would it take for you to step out of your comfort zone and do the thing that makes you scared?
What good could come from you doing this thing?
I urge you to take the chance, do the thing, and celebrate you for your courage.
]]>I learned so much from reading the book that I was able to change how I reacted to the people around me and was even able to get promoted a few times at work. Taking it outside of work, I have much more control of my reactions and interactions with people. Sometimes it just takes a change in perspective, and a little growing up, to improve your life.
It was sometime in 2012 or 2013 when we stumbled into a beautiful used book store in Downtown Salt Lake City, Utah. We had a few hours to kill before needing to catch our red-eye back to Orlando, and I was surprisingly able to convince hubby to browse with me. Fast forward about an hour, and we’ve walked through the sections that we were interested in, and grabbed a couple books to take home. It was on our way to the register when we walked past the self-help section (one of my favorite sections). I saw this beautiful old book that definitely had some wear and when I pulled it out, it was Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, with the well-worn dust cover inside the book.
To understand why this book was so impactful for me, you have to understand my mindset before reading the book. There was a time in my life when I felt like everyone was always out for themselves and wanted to take advantage of those who truly just wanted to help. There were several times when I would help someone only to have them throw me under the bus or stab me in the back afterward. The more this happened, the angrier I became.
Once I started reading the book, I couldn’t put it down. So many of the stories he told were relatable in some fashion to what I was going through at the time or had gone through in the past. These were people in the 1930s who were having to deal with rude entitled customers and people who didn’t know how to keep their thoughts and comments to themselves. So, while the stories were not the same, the problems were. I had been told so many times that you cannot change people, you can only change how you react to them. Dale Carnegie took that statement one step further and gave examples and actionable steps to take in those situations. Each tip was accompanied by a story that helped me to see at what point in the interaction to take those steps. That was the critical piece.
Shortly after reading the book, we were having an issue at work and I had to take action. I had to send an email to the whole company reminding them of something that I’d been telling them for years. Instead of accusing them of not listening and causing the problem, I framed it as a reminder that we all need sometimes, including myself. That email was well received and prompted an email from my VP letting me know that he thought the email was well written. That was the first instance of proof that the strategies work. Many more have followed since. While I need reminders occasionally, I try to use the strategies regularly. Since my first email, I have been able to diffuse several situations that would have previously triggered an angry reaction. I feel a lot less stress now and can think through difficult situations more effectively. Since that time, I have been promoted several times and I truly believe that the skills I learned in this book were a key influencing factor.
If you have not read How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie, I highly suggest you read it ASAP. If you have read it, there is a book summary on Audible that is great for a refresher. These skills are key to your success, and they’re so easy to learn.
Buy it here on Amazon:
*As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases
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Are you happy with how you are treated by others? Are you happy with how you are treated by you?
I recently had an experience where I realized that I wasn’t showing up in the way that I wanted to at work. There were little incidents that kept escalating over the course of about a year and then the final incident made me realize that I haven’t been speaking up as much as I should have. Part of the reason is that I was fighting back so I didn’t see it as a problem at first because I wasn’t allowing the other person to walk all over me. But another part of the reason, that I hadn’t truly admitted to myself, was that I lacked the experience that a lot of the others at work have. Granted experience comes with age and a lot of the people that I work with are at least 10 years older than me. So intellectually I know that there is no way I will ever have an equal amount of experience but it can still be intimidating. Maybe it’s partially imposter syndrome. All I know is that it escalated to the point where I was disrespected in a meeting and had to take an immediate stand. After I calmed down a bit (it took a couple of weeks before I could talk about it without getting pissed off) I realized that while I’ve been pushing back, I hadn’t made it abundantly clear what my boundaries were. This is where the question comes up: How are you showing up in your world?
How are you showing up for yourself?
How do you talk to yourself? Do you allow yourself room to make mistakes? Room to grow? Have you set boundaries with yourself and others? Setting boundaries with yourself is just as important as setting boundaries with others. So many of us are our own worst enemies when it comes to self-talk and belief in our capabilities. Would you let someone talk to your loved ones the way you talk to yourself? If your answer is no then STOP ALLOWING YOU TO SAY IT TO YOU!
How are you showing up to your co-workers?
We spend so much of our time at work that it is inevitable that we will build some sort of relationships with our co-workers. How do they see you? Are you part of the team and your thoughts and ideas considered equally? Or do they see you as someone they can ignore or take advantage of? Do you stand up for what you know is the right thing to do at work? I’m sure we have all worked with someone who felt that they had the right to be disrespectful to others because no one ever set the boundary with them. We know that it should not happen in any workplace. Remember the term “respectful workplace”? We’ve heard it for years at my job but it still happens. This is where you decide how you want to be treated and you make it clear to anyone who disrespects you. Now I’m not saying that you get to walk in and expect to have your co-workers grovel at your feet but you should not go into work every day dreading the people that you work with because of their attitudes towards you.
How are you showing up to your family and friends?
What is your relationship like with your family and friends? Do they respect your need for privacy, if that is important to you? Do they respect your need to make your own decisions in life? Do they respect your decisions? Do they respect you as an individual as well as a part of the family? Many times we don’t stand up for ourselves when it comes to our family as much as we should. Your family may not be as supportive as you would like them to be or they may expect to have a say in every aspect of your life. A lot of times people will project their fears onto you. For example, you want to start a business but your family says you should stick with your good paying job. That could be coming from their fear of you experiencing hardship or just fear of the unknown. Each generation has its own set of beliefs and that is how they see the world. The same can be said of your friends. They may genuinely be concerned for your livelihood and want to protect you. The reality is that you control how much interaction you have with them, whether they are your friends or your family. If you are not getting what you need, you determine how the relationship continues.
If you are repeatedly experiencing situations where you are not happy with how you are treated, you need to make a decision now. Will you allow your unhappiness to continue or will you stand in your power and demand the respect you deserve? The next time something happens or someone says something that you don’t like, stand up for yourself. If you need to take time to calm your emotions, then do that but do not let too much time pass. You are the only one who can decide what you will accept from others.
]]>Normally, I use this time of the year to reflect on the previous 12 months and then determine my goals for the year ahead. With this being the end of a decade, I had to take it to a whole new level. If you are a fan of Marie Forleo, then I’m sure you have already seen her Decade In Review blog posts or watched her on MarieTV. She has an amazing 3-part review to help you reflect on your accomplishments, lessons, and goals for the coming year and decade. That is what I used for my reflection this year. If you have not seen her on MarieTV or read the Decade In Review blog posts, I strongly suggest you check it out here.
For me so much has happened and so much has changed since January 1, 2010. I have grown into a person that I did not expect at the start of this decade. It all started at the very beginning of the decade with the unanticipated launch of a business (Conscious Mind Records, Inc.) in January and followed by my graduation in February. In following Marie’s Decade In Review, some of the accomplishments I am most proud of include:
Marie’s next area of focus is the lessons that we have learned. Over the past decade so of my most game-changing lessons were:
The third area that Marie asks us to focus on is what are we willing to let go of in this next decade. To me, the most important part of this is the old stories and limiting beliefs you have been telling yourself for years. For this, I will focus on releasing these limiting beliefs:
Continuing with the future-focused theme, Marie walks you through identifying your goals for the next decade and then focusing on what you want to accomplish in the next year. My top 3 goals for 2020 are:
To close out this decade in review, Marie asks you to imagine that you are at the end of the next decade, so 10 years in the future. What does your future-self want your present-day self to know now? While I won’t share my letter with you, I do highly suggest that you do this. You’d be surprised at how easy the writing comes to you.
Once you have completed this decade in review, you now have a framework to start planning how you will achieve your 2020 goals.
Next week we will start focusing on the importance of visualizing and having a vision board. Also stay tuned for the launch of my first online course, Creating Your Vision Board. Whether you have created vision boards before or this is your first time, this FREE course can help you focus on your vision and give you some ideas of how to create your next vision board. To be notified when this course is launching, pre-register here.
]]>I have mentioned several times in previous blog posts that I believe focusing on your strengths is a great way to build your self-confidence. Challenges with self-confidence can be intimidating. But it doesn’t have to ruin your ability to go after great opportunities. In fact, by embracing your primary strengths, you can develop the self-belief you've always yearned for.
Use these strategies for embracing your strengths and put your confidence issues behind you:
As you work towards developing self-confidence, remember that you are your only hindrance. There isn’t an external factor that can prevent you from becoming the person you want to be.
Challenge yourself. Push yourself to feel uncomfortable if that's what it takes to prove your strength. In time, you'll start to feel your confidence building. And soon, there won't be a door you feel intimidated to open!
]]>You'll appreciate your good life when the majority of your thoughts remain positive. Negative thoughts can sometimes be overwhelming, and just because you have them doesn't mean you're a bad person. They happen to everyone, but you can strive to keep them to a minimum with the help of a grateful attitude.
]]>How do you feel when someone sincerely expresses his or her gratitude to you for something you did? Doesn't it make you feel good about yourself? These positive feelings can lift you up, boost your enthusiasm, and motivate you to achieve even more.
Feeling grateful for what you have can produce the same good feelings and sustain your drive toward your goals.
This shows how gratitude can have some seriously positive snowball effects.
Here are some of the benefits of gratitude:
Show Your Gratitude Every Day
Showing gratitude to others may seem like a selfless act, but it's something that you also benefit from.
When you show your gratitude every day, you change the way you think.
You'll appreciate your good life when the majority of your thoughts remain positive. Negative thoughts can sometimes be overwhelming, and just because you have them doesn't mean you're a bad person. They happen to everyone, but you can strive to keep them to a minimum with the help of a grateful attitude.
One way to show your gratitude every day is to remind yourself of the big picture when a negative thought arises. If a petty argument with your spouse makes you feel angry and heated, take a deep breath and think for a moment. Remember that the argument is not permanent and, instead, feel grateful for the gift of this relationship. Remember the good things that they do for you and your family. Think of the times they have made you smile.
If you are interested in starting a gratitude practice and don’t yet have a gratitude journal, you can download my FREE Gratitude Worksheet here.
Our days on this earth are numbered so we must cherish the time that we do have and enjoy the benefits of living each day as if it were our last.
]]>We all have something to be thankful for, even those who live a modest lifestyle by choice or by circumstance.
Life is a miracle and can be taken away at a moment’s notice. This is something that many people do not think about every day, only with the sudden loss of a loved one. Each and every day is another chance to get it right. Every day is an opportunity to take action on your goals, to express your love and appreciation for your friends and family, to make a difference in someone’s life.
Regardless of your spiritual beliefs, there are many ways you can show your appreciation for your life.
5 Ways to Express Your Gratitude
Sometimes showing your gratitude can be as simple as saying “thanks,” but other times you can show gratitude by helping others, or “paying it forward.” After all, you’ll never know how a simple, kind gesture will affect someone’s day.
Here are some ideas to help you appreciate life while also helping others:
When You Need a Wake-Up Call
Sometimes it’s all too easy to engage in these activities and give thanks for a good life, yet over time, we somehow fall back into our old habits. In these times, we need a jolt to remind ourselves of all that is good.
Giving IS Receiving
When you give of yourself – either with a smile or another kind gesture – you receive the warm satisfaction of helping to make a difference in the world, one person at a time. Your uplifting attitude will be contagious and you just might be the recipient of a random act of kindness!
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Gratitude isn’t a common habit, but without gratitude, life is more challenging than it needs to be. Feeling grateful resets your perspective, and this is a gift you can give yourself each day. If you find yourself feeling pessimistic or overwhelmed, a little gratitude can get your attitude back on the right track.
Gratitude is free, enjoyable, and effective.
Be grateful for everything you have. Even if you’re struggling to survive below the poverty level, you’re still living better than the vast majority of the world’s population. That doesn’t mean you have to be satisfied with your current situation, but you can still be grateful for what you do have.
Practice gratitude. Your mood and perspective will be lifted. Your opportunities for success will increase. And you’ll receive even more good things to be grateful for!
If you would like to start a gratitude practice, you can download our FREE Gratitude Worksheet here. Use it to write down 3 things that you are grateful for each day.
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Even if you are going through some difficult times, you still have something to be grateful for. Having a roof over your head, having food in your kitchen, having the ability to provide for your family. These are all things to be grateful for. Waking up to see another day is a blessing in itself for each day is an opportunity to change your circumstances.
As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, I believe in The Secret and The Law of Attraction. You attract what you focus on, so why not focus on the good things in our life so that you attract more of them?
Here are five ways that showing gratitude attracts more abundance into your life:
Your life begins to take a turn for the better when you keep in mind how fortunate you really are. The smallest details can boost your spirits. The misfortune of others will prompt you to help them seek support, and life just begins to look a little brighter.
Start a daily gratitude practice. Every day take a minute to make of list of things you are grateful for. What happened today that made you smile? Even if it was something small, write it down. Did a stranger hold a door open for you? Did someone smile and say good morning to you? Did you have food in your house or enough money to buy lunch today? Did you wake up in a bed? These are all things to write down. Keep in mind, the goal is not to write the same things every day but to continue looking for all the ways that you are blessed and acknowledge them. After a while, you will start to look for things to add to your list.
If you find it difficult to start a daily gratitude practice, we have designed a gratitude worksheet that you can print out every month. At the end of each day write down 3 things you are grateful for. You can save these and look over them when you are feeling down or unmotivated. You can download the gratitude worksheet here.
Starting today, take your positive mindset to new heights and make every day a personal day of thanksgiving!
]]>There’s a critical flaw in this mental exercise. You simply don’t have all the information. Someone might have a great body, but they might be seriously ill. That great vacation might have been paid for with an inheritance after a family member passed away. This façade, this public image is all you will get to see of 99.9% of the world population. Think about it, how much of your struggle do you want to share with the rest of the world? It’s much easier to hide the struggle and only share the parts that will make everyone think your life is awesome.
Instead of comparing yourself to the public image of others compare yourself to your own recent past. Are you tracking your achievements and celebrating them? How is your figure compared to 6 months ago? How are your finances compared to last year? If you’re making progress, congratulate yourself. Most people aren’t doing nearly as well. They’ve weighed the same and had the same financial struggle for the last 20 years. If your life isn’t moving forward, then take pause and address the situation. This is the point where you take ownership of your life and your goals. If you’ve accomplished your last set of goals, write some new ones. The more time you spend focusing on your goals, the less time you have to focus on what someone else is doing.
Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” Think about that statement and decide if it rings true for you.
Try these tips to free yourself from unnecessary comparisons:
Comparing yourself to others is detrimental to your mental health. It is limiting and self-defeating. No one can be expected to compare favorably to the vast number of people in the world. Make an effort to limit your comparisons. Focus on your goals and the actions needed to accomplish them. Are you making progress? If you continue to enhance the areas that are important to you, your life is likely to be fulfilling and exciting!
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Let’s look at the definition of potential. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the first definition of potential (noun) is “something that can develop or become actual.” In this sense, potential is a funny thing. While there are many other definitions, there is one thing that all of them have in common. Potential can’t be quantified. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be cultivated. While I’m definitely not the expert on potential, I’ve had to work through some of my own issues to realize some of the potential that others saw in me. Now I’d like to help you do the same.
Here are 10 tips that can help you reach your full potential:
It’s doubtful that anyone comes close to reaching the peak of their potential, but all of us can do much more than what we’re currently doing. Decide to become the best possible version of yourself. Your potential is only limited by the limits you place on yourself.
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Every day when you wake up you are getting a fresh start. Don't focus on the mistakes you made yesterday or the opportunities you missed. Focus on what you can do today to make it a great day. Remember, consistent action gets you to your goal. Keep looking forward and you will get there!
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Creativity is not a lack of intelligence. It is quite the opposite actually. If you consider some of histories greatest artists, they were also extremely intelligent, though some may have been considered a bit crazy. Encourage creativity in children and adults. You'll be surprised at the results.
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Take a look at what you wrote down. How close are you? How many things have you done this year that you truly enjoyed? Let’s take a closer look at where you are and plan out the rest of your year.
Looking at your goal sheet, what do you want to accomplish by the end of this year? What steps have you taken so far? Let’s break this down into bite-size pieces.
To get to your end goal in December, what actions do you need to accomplish each month? These are your 6 milestones. Now let’s look at the first milestone.
What can you accomplish this month?
To meet your goal for this month, what can you accomplish this week?
And finally, what can you do you today to get you closer to your weekly goal?
Ask yourself these questions every morning/week/month and you’ll be amazed at how much you accomplish by the end of the year.
If you are new to Coffee.Yoga.Life. and haven’t read my other blog posts are goal setting, here are a couple links to get you started:
https://coffeeyogalife.com/blogs/thoughts/what-is-your-path-to-success
https://coffeeyogalife.com/blogs/thoughts/no-more-new-years-resolutions
Let me know in the comments how you are doing on your goals, what you find difficult, and what you have learned about yourself in the process.
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Get started today! Don't wait for the perfect time. The time will never be perfect. What do you want to do? What do you want to accomplish? Go for it now. Think of all the things you wanted to start years ago. Where would you be today if you had started then? Write down all your reasons why you think you can't and come up with an argument for how you can overcome those obstacles. No matter how crazy the idea sounds to you, write it down. Write down what you can do with no help as well as what you can do with help and who can help you. A way will be made if you put your mind to it. Don't think of how just focus on the what. Trust in the universe.
]]>As women, we try to take on the world. We are expected to be wives, mothers, caretakers, chefs, maids, taxi cabs, administrative assistants, and full-time employees/ business owners. And to top it off we are always expected to look and feel sexy, and be ready to always cater to everyone else’s needs, ignoring our own needs if someone else needs something at the same time. We are never allowed to be tired, to express emotion, or to want alone time to just be. Society has placed such a heavy burden on women that it is truly surprising more women haven’t gone on strike. The saddest part of it is that a lot of it comes from other women, especially the older generations who don’t understand that life today isn’t what it was 50 years.
It is time to take a stand for your right to just be. If you have the energy to get things done, great. If you feel like you need a mental health day, take it. You are allowed to stay home in your PJs all day. You are allowed to feed everyone cereal for dinner. You are allowed to take a day, or a few, to focus on the activities that make you happy. If you haven’t figured out what that is, check out my blog post How to Find your Happiness. If that means spending a day or two immersed in a book, then grab your book, a snack and a drink and enjoy. If that means finding childcare for 1 or 2 days a week so that you can focus on your business, then do it. If that means getting your hair and nails done then treating yourself to lunch, make your appointments and go. If it means taking a walk in the park or soaking in a bubble bath, schedule the time and do it.
One of the keys to this approach is to listen to your body. Your body knows how much energy you have to expend. When you wake up in the morning, take a minute to listen to what your body is telling you. If you wake up with energy, identify how that energy can best be used for the day. If you wake up feeling tired, take it easy that day. It is perfectly ok to not leave your house all day and binge watch a new series on Netflix. If that’s how you feel then honor it.
I recently started listening to Do Less: A Revolutionary Approach to Time and Energy Management for Busy Moms by Kate Northrup. So far it is absolutely wonderful. Our society places such importance on being busy that they don’t allow you to just be. And it is especially difficult for women, despite the progress towards equality. Kate talks about how our bodies operate in cycles and she highlights the differences between the cycles of men and the cycles of women. What immediately caught my attention was that men operate on 24-hour cycles while women operate on 28ish day cycles. By understanding and working within the energy of our cycles we can be much more effective, while also feeling less stressed. While I haven’t made it past chapter 2 yet, I am already pulled in. This is one of those books where I am seriously considering buying the physical copy as well. Kate does an excellent job of breaking down her concepts and including scientific research as well. She is not just writing about a concept that she learned about, she is writing about her experience as a new mother and being forced to listen to her body. After realizing that she was able to bring in the same revenue in her business while only being available 50% of the time compared to the previous year, she started doing her research.
So far in just the intro, chapter 1 and the first part of chapter 2, I have learned so much. With the continued push for everyone to do more and more, I highly recommend you get a copy of this book to learn how to do less and achieve more.
]]>This is your life! You need to understand what your truth is and fight for that. That is your obligation! That is your responsibility! That is your right! Take the time to get to know you. You are so worth it!
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